Are you a Baby Boomer caregiver for your aging parents? Many of us are. When you see your aging parent slowly slipping away, he or she might start talking to deceased relatives, angels or invisible pets. Is he or she having a near death experience (NDE)? In their mental state, are they really talking with someone you can’t see or is it just the effects of the painkillers keeping them comfortable? Before you dismiss Near Death Experience as paranormal, consider the following survey results about NDEs.
Survey’s conducted by Gallup, Knoblauch, and Roy Morgan Catibus in 1982, 1992, 2001 and 2005 respectively reveal that between 4% and 15% or about 1.95 billion of the world’s population had experienced NDEs (Near Death Experiences.) If you would like to talk with people sharing their NDE experience, check out www.nderf.org. You’ll discover a lot of helpful resources where evidence suggests and confirms NDEs are indeed real.
A new study witnessed by medical professionals reveals that consciousness continues after death. You may find this information helpful and amazing. It could help you cope better with your own understanding about life and death. You can read that article here.
Whether you believe in NDEs or not, as a Baby Boomer caregiver, I encourage you to focus on improving the quality of life for your aging parent. This improved life quality also means taking time for yourself when you need to rest. Also, listening compassionately to what your parents are saying helps improve their life quality. Making fun when they tell you they’ve talked with their deceased loved on may simply alienate your relationship with them. Being a compassionate listener will help you create a happy memory during this time of need.
After having my own near death experiences, I stopped feeling afraid of dying. I now look at “death” simply as a step in letting your spirit come out of a physical energy field. Each of us is made up of energy fields. The four main energy field components that make up a human are the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual energy field. Understanding that each of us is a spiritual being having a human experience, when I sometimes miss Jason (my first born son who died at age twelve of a rare birth disorder) I remind myself that he always was separate from his physical body. Because in the human experience we all have a time limit to play the role of human, I look for ways to accept his young passing from this life.
If you are interested in reading about Jason’s short life, please click here.
If you want to know more about the near death experience, please check out my book on Near Death Experiences here.
Last night I spoke with a friend who’s aging mother is in the process of passing. Having a lot of experience in palliative care with children and adults, I know that focusing on providing comfort is a key to coping better with the crossing over event. I suggested some things for her to do to prepare for the inevitable. One of those things was asking the doctor to check for toxic blood levels of medications.
When a person’s body starts to deteriorate, he or she may be unable to metabolize medicine as do healthier people. Changing medication dosages may help reduce nausea or other unwanted side affects. So if you are a caregiver, ask the doctor about this. Don’t do it arbitrarily yourself. Let the doctor do it. He or she will know how to handle it.
I know when my own son was dying, nothing else mattered to me except what could comfort him. That eventually included making sure to “keep it together” when I saw things about his body changes that seemed upsetting to me. I’m so sensitive to preventing people’s suffering that If I needed to “fall apart,” I did it when I was away from him. This is one way I helped him be comfortable. He didn’t see me cry when I felt helpless to improve things. It also helped him be calm and feel supported, loved and accept the event as just a normal part of the cycle of life.
Are you dealing with the stress of tending to your aging parents imminent crossing over? If so, maybe I can help. Please email me with your concerns at [email protected]. Maybe we can talk about things in a way that helps you cope better with it all.